Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
