Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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