so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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