What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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