Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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