Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
