So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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