Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
