Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(339): View more from Massachusetts

so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...

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(602): View more from Arizona

if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy

(1-602): View more from Arizona

amen to that sister

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(631): View more from New York

It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.

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(313): View more from Michigan

I can get orange kush...

(586): View more from Michigan

GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!

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(304): View more from West Virginia

Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card

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(903): View more from Texas

As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.

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(802): View more from Vermont

I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.

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(785): View more from Kansas

plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together

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(609): View more from New Jersey

I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".

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