hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Randomize