Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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