i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
My dick has a subreddit
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
