yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
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