She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize