these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
