I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
The air taste purple.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
