just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize