He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
