Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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