shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Randomize
