I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Randomize
