elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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