He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
