That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
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