No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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