there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
