It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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