What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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