What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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