im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Randomize
