remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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