How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
