whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
