Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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