3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Randomize
