No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
