I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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