Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
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