I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
My breasts were aching with rage.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
