well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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