Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
