He uses pillows to masturbate.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
My vagina just recognized that song.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
