Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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