Soap is not a condiment
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Randomize
