I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
