this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Randomize
