she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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