I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
