just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
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