i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
