Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
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