Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
